Notes From Cuckoo Island

aka The Cowboy Carol

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On the first day of Covid, my husband gave to me…a warehouse full of useless PPE.

On the second day of Covid, my husband gave to me…loads of lords a-plotting, and a warehouse full of useless PPE.

On the third day of Covid, my husband gave to me…a bogus Hong Kong firm, loads of lords a-plotting, and a warehouse full of useless PPE.

On the fourth day of Covid, my husband gave to me…dozens of dead medics, a bogus Hong Kong firm, loads of lords a-plotting, and a warehouse full of useless PPE.

On the fifth day of Covid, my husband gave to me…60 million quid, dozens of dead medics, a bogus Hong Kong firm, loads of lords a-plotting, and a warehouse full of useless PPE.

On the sixth day of Covid, my husband gave to me…a 130ft yacht, 60 million quid, dozens of dead medics, a bogus Hong Kong firm, loads of lords a-plotting, and a warehouse full of useless PPE.

On the seventh day of Covid, my husband gave to me…more plastic surgery, a 130ft yacht, 60 million quid, dozens of dead medics, a bogus Hong Kong firm, loads of lords a-plotting, and a warehouse full of useless PPE.

On the eighth day of Covid, my husband gave to me…frozen bank accounts, more plastic surgery, a 130ft yacht, 60 million quid, dozens of dead medics, a bogus Hong Kong firm, loads of lords a-plotting, and a warehouse full of useless PPE.

On the ninth day of Covid, my husband gave to me…threats of libel action, frozen bank accounts, more plastic surgery, a 130ft yacht, 60 million quid, dozens of dead medics, a bogus Hong Kong firm, loads of lords a-plotting, and a warehouse full of useless PPE.

On the tenth day of Covid, my husband gave to me…suspension from the Lords, threats of libel action, frozen bank accounts, more plastic surgery, a 130ft yacht, 60 million quid, dozens of dead medics, a bogus Hong Kong firm, loads of lords a-plotting, and a warehouse full of useless PPE.

On the eleventh day of Covid, my husband gave to me… a plethora of law suits, suspension from the Lords, threats of libel action, frozen bank accounts, more plastic surgery, a 130ft yacht, 60 million quid, dozens of dead medics, a bogus Hong Kong firm, loads of lords a-plotting, and a warehouse full of useless PPE.

On the twelfth day of Covid, my husband gave to me…a Kuenssberg confession, a plethora of law suits, suspension from the Lords, threats of libel action, frozen bank accounts, more plastic surgery, a 130ft yacht, 60 million quid, dozens of dead medics, a bogus Hong Kong firm, loads of lords a-plotting, and a warehouse full of useless PPE.

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MERRY CHRISTMAS FROM CUCKOO ISLAND TO (NEARLY) ALL, AND GOODWILL TO (SOME) MEN*

*No, not you, Barrowman